How Did It Get To Be December 30th Already?

Seriously, it should be illegal for the calendar pages to be flipping by this fast! I don't have my 2010 goals even close to being met, the Christmas tree is still up, we are way behind in driving hours for the kids and I have absolutely no clue how we will be spending New Year's Eve tomorrow! If we could postpone the new year for another month or so, that would work! haha

We had a very nice Christmas with my brother here for 2 nights. It was awkward the first year or two he stayed with us after it became apparent Mom was no longer up to overnight guests (and then went into a nursing home the following year). He works 3rd shift and when here would alternate between being grumpy on the couch, snipping at the kids to be quiet, and following me around constantly. A couple years ago, it dawned on me that I could CHOOSE to be kind and loving to him, regardless of how he acted, and that I NEEDED to CHOOSE to be kind and loving because my not-so-nice attitude toward him was rubbing off on my kids. The next year, I was very deliberate in taking time just to talk with him and spend time really getting to know him better. He's 10+ years older than me and even though we're only 2 hours apart in driving distance, we rarely see each other more than once or twice a year. That visit went so much better! And then last year, he told me that he on days he works, he does not go to bed to sleep, that he can't sleep during the day when it's so bright out and there is day time noise. Well, gee, that might explain his grumpiness if he's going 3 or 4 days without extended sleep! Understanding that has also changed my attitude and helped the kids understand why if he's snoring, we could give him the gift of being quiet for an hour or two. So this was a nice visit, and we actually talked about him coming up for a weekend this summer to spend with us.

I know these next few weeks are going to fly by, too. We still haven't finalized New Year's Eve plans, which I really need to do in the next couple of hours. Do we stay home and try to stay awake, well, do I try to stay awake? haha Or do we go to Cincinnati and spend the night with some friends? We need to get back to Columbus to have a mini Christmas with my niece, and a friend from church talked about coming over tomorrow or Saturday to show the kids how to change a tire, check fluid levels in the car, etc. Work has been super-slow this afternoon and promises to be slow tomorrow, too, so I also debated about trying to get my shopping done before the after-work crowd hits the stores. We'll see, but I'd better decided something, anything!, here soon. If we don't go to Cincinnati this weekend, we're going next weekend. Then we have a couple kids' 16th birthdays a couple weeks after that. And I need to meet up with my best friend from high school for our annual after-Christmas dinner in the next week or two. Somewhere in there I need to shop for said birthdays and try and get a semblance of a meal plan going so when DS comes home from school and inevitably asks what's for dinner, he does get "I don't know" every day! Is it sad that I'm already looking forward to a nap on January 23? :-)

Stocking Stuffers for Teens

Gone are the days when I could go to Big Lots or the dollar store and fill a stocking for the kids in under $10. I don't recall exactly how much I spent to fill stockings last year, but I do remember, when it was all said and done, that I promised myself to never spend that much again. So this year I set a goal of $20 per child to fill the stockings, and I have been keeping my eyes open all year for stuffers with pretty good results.

Both kids are getting candy, bought on sale with coupons and CVS Extra Care Bucks/Walgreen's Register Rewards. They are also both getting T-shirts. DD's is from her favorite Christian band, Kutless, bought during a summer sale for $5 and free shipping. DS's is a graphic Christian T, bought for $6 on sale from the local Christian bookstore. Not only are they inexpensive gifts, they serve to take up some room in the stocking! They will also get a book that I got for free off Paperback Swap.

DD is also getting Eos lip balm, her favorite. This normally runs for $3-4, but by getting them when Walgreens was offering a $3.99 Register Reward, I consider them free. She's getting all 3 varieties. She is also getting 2 bottles of nail polish, which were $0.99 total after clearance and ECBs at CVS.

DS is also getting a small hack saw to add to his tool collection, $4.99 at Wal-Mart (the only thing I bought full price so far) and a mini Joy of Baking kit, as he loves to bake cookies, bought on sale after Easter at Borders book store.

I still want to pick up tire air pressure gauges for both kids, which I've seen for about $2 around town, and then I should be done. All in all, I will have spent less than $20 per stocking. The kids will be thrilled on Christmas morning, and I'm thrilled that I kept within my budget!

Another Conversation I Didn't Want to Have

One thing about being a single parent is, you definitely get your share of questions that married parents don't get. In the car last night, DD asked me again why her dad and I got divorced. She has asked this in the past, and I've been able to give a generic yet true answer, but last night she really pushed. She said that now that her dad has decided to be back in their lives, she thought she deserved to know why he walked away in the first place. I tried to answer her in honest yet vague replies because, frankly, there is no way on this earth that I will ever, ever tell her the main reason we split. No. Way. (I can count on 1 hand the number of people who know that, and that includes my brothers and best friend, and I plan on keeping it that way.) Well, that didn't satisfy her. She accused me of thinking she wasn't mature enough to know the truth, and I told her that actually it was just the opposite. I feel she is mature enough that with what she already knows, she should be able to figure out why we split. After talking a while, she still didn't like my answers, even when I confirmed some of her suspicions, and said she would "just have to call Dad and ask him." I don't think she was expecting me to tell her that was fine, but I did! I told her I'd get her their number whenever she wanted to call. (She hasn't asked for it yet.)

This is a no-win situation. She is persistent, and nothing but (what she thinks) is the whole truth will satisfy her. I gave her a little more information when we got home, but immediately regretted it. I need to learn to keep my mouth shut sometimes! Not that what I said was bad or a lie, but it just really didn't need to be said. Anyhow, as I said, it's a no-win. She's not going to be happy because I'm determined not to give more information unless I have to clarify something she has heard from her dad or other people, and I'm not going to be happy because I don't think this is the end of the topic for her. I told her that I try hard, and don't always succeed, to try not to talk badly about her dad, that I did what I had to do to protect her and her brother and that I did not want them ever in a position where they felt they had to "choose sides." I did try to make a mini learning lesson out of this in that, while I'm so very glad to have her and her brother, our marriage was not in God's will since He specifically says not to be yoked with unbelievers, and she reiterated that that won't be an issue for her because she is only going to marry an evangelical Christian! *sigh* Only time will tell where this leads. Hopefully she is satisfied for a long while. This is not a conversation I'm anxious to have again anytime soon.